What it’s like to work in an Orphanage

What it’s like to work in an Orphanage

I dressed myself in my newly brought traditional Curti and placed a scarf over my hair (the horrors of my dad tugging a nit comb through my hair from my childhood definitely made me want to prevent getting lice at all costs!) It was day one of working in the orphanage. A place I would come to know well during the next month. I had heard many stories of what it was like, how intense it is, how emotionally draining it gets, how much Poop you deal with on a daily basis. So during the 30minete rickshaw ride I felt rather prepared for what I was about to face. 

The two story complex stood tall, placed on a back road away from the Main Street. The windows seemed to have mesh covering them, coupled with a few bars which made it impossible to see in. The painted walls of the fence displayed happy faces and many bright colours. Similar decorated stairs carried me to the second floor where the kids were. Smiles and stares filled my vision as little hands pulled at my clothes  while cocked necks and eyes beamed up at me. About 40 kids, aged 1-6 all sat in this corridor. It was shower time. I was taken back as I watched how forcefully the women held the kids down to wash and rinse them with a bucket and a bar of soap, right there in the corridor. We all got to work, each with a task. Someone on placing diapers on the younger ones, someone undressing, someone drying and someone dressing (Every morning we bring diapers to the orphanage as they cannot fund it themselves). Even with the younger ones wearing diapers it still turns into a poop war zone, with little deposits placed everywhere.

As I dressed them in whatever clothes seemed to fit them it struck me. Nothing is their own. They don’t have that personal entitlement of ownership. They all share clothes, staff members attention as well as volunteers, no toys are in the orphanage, they literally don’t have anything that is individually theirs. I’ve noticed that with even the smallest of things, a button or a packet of tissues they are extremely protective, for this reason. 

I think at first for a while I just shut my emotions off in order to deal with them. Because when I truely addressed them I couldn’t bare it. It was too overwhelming. These kids don’t have any parents. I mean how do you comprehend what that would be like? No base? No one to tuck you in at night and tell you they love you as they plant a kiss on your forehead? They wake up have a wash, eat (usually something not very nutritious like a lolly or a few biscuits) go into a room where there is a TV and watch it for hours before taking a nap and repeating the cycle. They only go outside of the orphanage twice a year, On a picnic which the volunteering organisation plans. 

Some of the kids backgrounds are just insane. One of the boys witnessed his mother being murdered by his father, another’s mother is scarred with acid burns from a similar attack, others were simply dumped on the street or parents too unstable to take care of them.

Some of the children go to school, About 10. They are sponsored by mostly past volunteers to be able to afford to go to school. 

The kids call us ‘deedee’, meaning sister. I definitely am not going to miss hearing that word day in and out in about 40 voices all at the same time. 

The language barrier wasn’t a huge issue at the beginning as To keep them entertained all you had to do was piggy back them around the room, dance with them, poke funny faces at them, throw them around and show them a few hand games or so. Once I’d actually formed a connection with one (4 year old) girl in particular I wanted to be able to talk to her which was frustrating. It was amazing how we could form such a loving, emotional, goofy friendship with no words, just a heck of a lot of laughter. Everyday when I’d walk in, her beaming smile would come running into my lap coupled with a griping hug. As the days went on it was getting harder to cope with the fact that this would soon be gone. I would be ripped away from her, leaving her with that familiar feeling of abandonment. I’ve spent countless hours questioning if working in an orphanage for such a small amount of time (in the grand scheme of their lives) growing so close to the kids and then leaving is actually better or worse for them? In conclusion I find solace in the phrase, “it’s better to have loved and lost then to not love at all”. I mean if anything I’ve shown her what it means to give and receive love, what it means to be happy and given her some light in her world even if it was only for a brief amount of time.

The day came for me to leave. I managed, with some help, to translate to the women that I was leaving, this would be the last time me and my beautiful friend would see one another. We stood in that same corridor I’d first step foot in 4 weeks ago. The moment the Indian lady finished her sentence i saw the sadness in her little wee eyes, her bottom lip dropped and tears began welling in her eyes as well as mine. I held her so tightly for about 10 minetes before one of the ladies came to take her away. I had to peel her off me which made it 10 times harder to stop the tears from streaming down my cheeks. The pain was so aweful, I’ve never experienced something so emotionally powerful that my whole being was completely sucked into it. I was such a mess. I felt guilt, betrayal and utter sadness as I watched her scream and kick as she faded down the corridor. 

Before I mentioned all I’d given her by being at the orphanage. I failed to mention all she’s given me! So thank you my sweet girl, thank you for making ME smile everyday with your cheeky smile, genuine little laugh, the way you would insist I stand up and cart you round the room, throwing you from side to side, playing with my necklace and bracelet’s 24/7, undoing and re-doing a few million times and for teaching me that happiness is so simple. 

❤️❤️❤️ 

*for privacy I’ve left out photos and names.

Back into the swing of things

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Hello!

Yes, it is August and I am aware I have not updated my blog in over 9 months but i can assure you i am still alive! It has been a pretty full on year so far. I am currently in my final year of high school which is extremely exciting and nerve wracking. I love the idea of this time next year being able to be free from a lifetime of compulsory education, I love that i will have my own say and individuality in what i wish to pursue and where i want to take my life next which is thrilling. The negative aspect of it is that i do not know what i wish to do as a career or next year for that matter and as applying for universities is steadily approaching I have been turning over many ideas in my head as to what will become of 2016.

I will apply for all the universities I have even the slightest interest in attending to prolong having to make an immediate decision in hopes that i will decide what i want to do when the uni’s decide to accept me or not in January then i can accept or decline their offer. If i am still unsure I may take a gap year. I have been looking at becoming an Au Pair overseas so i can gain some hands on life experience and travel to broaden my horizons, then get back into Uni the following year as it is pretty much expected these days that in order to gain a decent income further tertiary education is a must. it of course does depend on your career path and as of now i am rather interested in a career in radio which is an industry where it is just as equally or more important as who you know rather than what you know. So if i was to go to uni right now i would do a bachelor of communications as AUT in Auckland 🙂

I have always had a passion for animals too so will perhaps look into that some more. There is this awesome website that my sister showed me called “Volunteerlovers.com” and it has some great programs that would be incredible to do! There is this one in Africa were you stay on a conservation area and monitor the species that live their in order to track poacher operations. Teaching children in Africa is another idea I have been mulling over, imagine how rewarding that would be? As well as such a huge life experience just to observe how a totally different culture lives. But of course all of these ideas require vast amounts of money that I, as a high school student with a part time job, do not have right now. So I will possibly work full time for half a year or so and then pursue my travels. 🙂 Then when I come back from my refresher I will have study to look forward to and possibly a great student loan! argh, so many decisions to make that need definitive answers so soon! So yeah, that is where I am at at this moment in time. For now I must focus on my studies as I have exams soon! Hope you all have a lovely day 🙂 (If anyone is reading this) xxx

Veganism?

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I am uber excited as this year is my last year at high school and although it is march and I am pretty much over it I am determined to make this year a better year then last. How will i do this you may ask? well, I am making a conscious effort to put myself out there more and take advantage of all opportunities given to me. I am going on the voyage, the spirit of New Zealand in June for 10 days which will be exciting and something totally different to anything i have done before. Also with my lifestyle. Over the past few years I have grown an interest in healthy foods and making healthier choices and what not and observing various lifestyles through instagram,youtube etc. There have been some crazy ways of living based off diet and exercise. I have discovered Freelee the banana girl who is vegan and eats 30 bananas a day! Eseenna Oneil who is such an inspirtaion, she is vegan too and People who eat just raw diets as well as Vegetarins, peskitarins, vegans etc. From observing these different ways of life and how it effects them and looking into the health benifits of them and also the negatives of living in these ways I have shaped my own opinion on food and exercise. And I have decided this year that for a month I will go Vegan and see what it is like and if i wish to adapt it as a lifestyle.

I have been brought up on having meat as part of my every day life. I have always had a soft spot for animals but never really questioned where and how this meat came to be on my dinner plate. On hearing many speeches and investigating the conditions imposed on these animals it is horrific. I discovered that veganism may be an option to not enforce this crulety inflicted on these animals.I also believe veganism comes with many health benefits. I am excited to try something new and experiment. As this is a drastic change in my life, although only just for a month, I have conducted alot of research in order to become vegan in a healthy way. Nutrition is extremely important to be and the last thing i want to do is eat wrong and not nourish my body with the right amounts of nutrients. This book “vegan for life” is amazing and literally gives you all the knowledge you need in order to be a healthy vegan. Of course i have not limited my sources to this one book as it may be biased but many websites are extremely helpful too as well as the vegan community on instagram and various social networks. The hardest part for me is definitely convincing my parents that it is a good idea which is why i am providing them with a list on how i will reach my nutritional needs whilst being vegan.

Here are a few links to the videos i watched which are very confronting and intriguing, they helped me reach my decision on veganism.

here is Essena 🙂
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCCOT5oNCUGCgyuAVntA8iog

Have a Lovely day! xxxx

New Zealand’s Love

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Haha aw, I love New Zealand so much. Despite having more sheep then people when one of us makes it in the world what do we do? non stop talk about them. Only here will you find when a New Zealander makes it on to the red chair on the Graham Nortan show it makes the news. I was sitting watching the news tonight and amidst all the deaths, wars, and the weather report there was a good 5 minute long story about how this guy named Ben from our country made it on to telling his story on the famous red chair during the Graham Nortan show.

Don’t even get me started on how proud we are of Lorde. Every movement that girl makes we are onto it! When Lorde was nominated for the Grammys I’m pretty sure her acceptance speech made an appearance three times during the new bulletin. We don’t get the Grammys live here but when Lorde was nominated for an award we surprisingly got it! I mean It is sweet how loving and supportive we are of our fellow kiwi’s but it’s just quite funny sometimes.

What’s something funny or unique that you love about your country?

On a side note I have not posted in like a week as I am back at school now and must use my time for boring school related things 😦 I can assure you I will remain as active as I can be! I will post as least once a week, I am still alive. 😀

Have a great day! Love Rose xxx

 

 

Cafe trip :)

One of the nicest things I love to do is discover new cafes in my town and try them out! The other day I went to this lovely country cafe in a place called Riverhead and for desert had this AMAZING macadamia slice. It was pure heaven. I have such a sweet tooth and this just satisfied my cravings yo 😀 This sounds crazy but my life actually revolves around food, I just hold out for the next time I can eat and have that delicious sensation when a meal just hits the spot. I cannot understand those people that don’t ever think about food and leave stuff on their plate and just eat because they should and get no joy out of it. wow this sounds way too serious for a post about food!

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But seriously please tell me other people feel this way and i’m not crazy right? ^-^

Enjoy your day! Love Rose xxx

Newbie :)

Hey guys!

ok so, I’ve decided to do the challenge on the daily post for bloggers that prompts you for things to write, and seeing as I am totally new to this world of blogging the challenge for october the 6th sounded perfect. 🙂

If I was to make a mix tape for a new friend to describe me this is what I would have feature on it:

1) Wild thing- by the Troggs ( i can get a bit crazy at the best of times, having fun is so important 🙂

2) Shake it off- Taylor Swift ( I try to take life by the day and not let things get to me which is usually a challenge as i tend to be quite sensitive)

3) Just Dance- David Bowie (aside from the fact that I love 60s music I find dancing makes me happy and just stress releasing)

4) Candy shop-50 cent ( I LOVE SWEETS!)

5) Loose yourself- Eminem ( eminem is amazeballs but I’m just constantly a lost soul, never fully 100% sure)

6) sweet home alabama-Lynyrd skynyrd ( I have such an urge to travel the world!)

7) Feeling good-Michael Buble ( a part from him having the sexiest jazz voice, who doesn’t want to feel good?)

8) Wings- Macklemore ( If I could have any power it would be to fly )

9) goodness Gracious- Ellie Goulding ( I tend to not use explicit language, when it can be helped 😉

10) Wild for the night- Asap Rocky ( partying and having a good time with ya friends is always a top priority :D)

11) Snow- Red hot chili peppers ( living in New Zealand and all we have christmas time in the summer and it never snows where i live, I’ve always wanted a white christmas or just a day off school to play in the snow!)

12) Piano Man- Billy Joel ( I have a desire to learn a musical instrument in the near future)

13) Who you are- Jessie J ( This is kind of an ironic one as I really don’t know who i am or who i want to be, i blame it on being a teenager 🙂

14) All of the stars- Ed Sheeran ( I find stars just so fascinating and magical)

15) I’m Ready- AJR (I want something new and different in my life, and that is pretty much the core reason for why i started this blog, to pretty much just write down my thoughts and ideas and see if anyone shares the same 🙂

16) Back to december-Taylor swift ( I was born in december, yay!)

17) supercalifragalisticexpialodotious- Mary Poppins ( I just had to put this one in as it is an incredibly hard to spell word and I am the worst speller you will ever meet, this whole post is pretty much all spell checked haha)

18) Happy Together- Fliter ( I am at my absolute happiest when around my friends and family 🙂

Have a lovely day! xxx